When you change yourself you change your world.
You can change how you feel about your world when you change how you look at it and how you react to it. You might not be able to control the external circumstances. But your choices about how to deal with it, your thoughts about it, and consequently your feelings are all absolutely within your control. All you have to do is become aware of this, and consciously choose rather than unconsciously react.
If you’re not happy at work, you can change your current job, you can change your entire career, or you can change the person you bring to work every day (that’s you).
If you’re not happy in your relationship, you can choose to leave, or you can look at the role you’ve been playing and choose to change it.
If you’re not happy with your appearance, you can choose to change your hairstyle, wardrobe, weight or you can choose to love and accept yourself exactly as you are.
I could go on, but you get the idea I’m sure. In each of the above and other examples, you could also choose not to change, but to complain and feel angry, disappointed, sad – in a word, unhappy.
I may risk your wrath and suffer a lot of unsubscribes here, but the truth of the matter is, if you’re unhappy about any area of your life, and you’re not choosing to make the changes yourself, you are in effect, albeit unconsciously, choosing to keep the status quo. You’re choosing to be unhappy.
I’ve said this before, I’m sure I’ll say it countless times in the future. The answer to almost every dilemma in your life lies within you, not without.
Everytime something goes awry in my life I look within. Not always immediately, I have to admit. Oftentimes I indulge myself with an unconscious reaction for a while. But that never helps.
What always helps is when I calm down and ask myself, how have I contributed to this situation or attracted this problem into my life? What thoughts and actions have led me here? And when the answer comes, I acknowledge it and I forgive myself. And then I change my thoughts and actions to be more aligned with how I would like things to be instead.
Works a treat – always.
The external circumstance won’t always magically change to suit your desires (although sometimes it will). But how you feel about that situation will change, and that is what really matters.
And when you feel better about a situation, you will be more empowered to make the difficult decisions. The ones you know in your heart and soul you need to make but were previously resisting (like change your career, or leave that relationship, or alter your attitude and behaviour).
The changes to your world that you want and need to make. The changes that begin when you learn to look inside – and reinvent yourself.